“If you put your mind to it, anything is possible.” – Kimberly Guilfoyle

We know that saying anything is possible is totally correct, but what about everything?  Maybe everything being possible is somewhat of a stretch.  Some things will still always remain impossible. 

Take winning the multimillion-dollar lottery.  What are your chances of winning?  Is it possible?  Yes, but maybe not probable.  Being hit by lightening is actually more probable. 

Even getting to work on time when you are running 20 minutes late may be somewhat impossible if you were supposed to be there 15 minutes ago.  Your rush to get there may get you into even more trouble.

When we try to make some of these impossible goals possible, we make our situation worse.  With the lottery we may only lose money.  But with the hurried attempt to get to work on time, we may lose even more.

“Positive thinking will let you do everything better than negative thinking will.”
Zig Ziglar

Displaced Positive Thinking 

Positive thinking is superior to negative thinking.  We know this is true.  But, when we try to suppress our thoughts, even negative ones, we actually make those thoughts louder and give them more power.  Suppressed thoughts and feelings are usually counterproductive because they still require cognitive recognition to block them.

In addition, there are times when thinking positive thoughts feels incongruent with who we are or the reality we are facing.  This cognitive dissonance will sabotage our attempts to maintain positive thinking because of the internal struggle we are having to believe these thoughts.

Eventually, we could start to feel guilty when we do feel negative thoughts even though these thoughts are quite normal.  In fact, we know that negative thoughts are much more automatic than positive thoughts.  Negative thoughts are believed to out-number positive thoughts by at least a 4 to 1 margin.

Considering these examples, by ignoring negative thoughts we may be missing significant warning signs that could be dangerous to our personal health.  Given the right circumstances, negative cognitions or feelings could be just as salient as positive ones.  

Therefore, it seems obvious that there is a relevance to having both positive and negative thoughts, maybe even to survive.  Obviously, negative thoughts that may be a warning sign for our safety, are not the same negative pattern that keeps us stuck in a destructive vortex of negative thinking.

“If you look for truth, you may find comfort in the end; if you look for comfort you will not get either comfort or truth only soft soap and wishful thinking to begin, and in the end, despair.” - C. S. Lewis

Wishful Thinking

When we are caught in the trap of wishful thinking, our wants are more important than our reality.  We want to believe something no matter what the truth actually is in reality. 

 “Life... It tends to respond to our outlook, to shape itself to meet our expectations.” - Richard M. DeVos

Great Expectations

Positive thinking and wishful thinking are part of the mindset we utilise to “meet our expectations” or “exceed our expectations”.  These expectations are considered reachable.  But what about when they are not reachable?  Even when they are possible this may not be the case all the time. 

The more we depend on these mindsets to bring our success, the more we set ourselves up for disappointment.  We may even find out that the higher our expectations, the greater the possibility of disappointment.

This means our expectations need to be aligned with our abilities to achieve success.  We cannot be expecting success without having the tools.  A carpenter does not go to work without a tool box. 

Just as important as having the right tools is having the right mindset.  Our expectations need to be realistic and obtainable, not impossible.  A mindset of your expectations being possible is fine.  As long as there is an accompanied mindset that is aware that it may become impossible.

“Logic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding.” - Ambrose Bierce

Implications

Events that exceed human limits are deemed impossible.  An incurable disease is one example.  Humans believing they can fly, even off the Eiffel tower, is another. 

Cognitively our short-term memory fades after a few hours.  Emotionally   patience is finite.  The possibilities of our physical, cognitive and emotional abilities are and will always be limited.  Part of our human capacity includes the possibility of being confronted with the impossible.

Accepting the impossible is not all bad.  There is an upside to knowing our limits as humans.  Definitely go hard for all your possibilities, by all means, but also know when to let go of the unattainable.