“The ending of irrational fantasies is always going to come as a rude jolt.”
Dominic Grieve

Fantasy and imagination are linked.  And, both concepts have positive implications most of the time.  However, what happens when your vivid imagination or fantasy actually distorts your reality?  And, what if this distortion is unknown to you?  Might this distortion of truth create dissonance within?  Could a fantasy memory replace an unwanted past, or become a desired past?     

False Memories

When we remember what did not happen, we are having a false memory.  Is this lying, exaggeration, or something else?  Could it even be a coping device?

Trauma often creates a perceived need to substitute memories that help victims to cope with an unbearable reality.  Over time this fantasy memory becomes not just a substitute for an unhealthy memory but a useful coping strategy.  Eventually, fantasy may even, at least at a conscious level, allow the trauma to be forgotten.  Obviously, because trauma is embedded in the subconscious, it may still be remembered when situations connected to the trauma are triggered.

A false memory could even become planted by accident.  False memories of sexual abuse are known to happen sometimes through the power of suggestion by a therapist.  A lack of trust, anger, or resentment of other family members could trigger someone in their stress and confusion to believe they were abused.   This is called False Memory Syndrome (FMS).   Which begs the question: “when we believe something is that a lie”?

Faulty eyewitness testimony is another potential result of false memories.  Hindsight bias creates the illusion of accuracy because we know the outcome.  When we know the outcome of an incident that awareness creates a biased opinion of what really happened.  Eyewitness testimony is refuted most of the time based on this type of bias. 

Wish Fulfilment

Sometimes our brain distorts or creates memories to align with desires, emotional needs, or to fill in gaps in knowledge.  These false memories are constructed to provide a displacement of an unpalpable past or magnify positive experiences. 

Freud’s theory of wish-fulfilment suggested that dreams, fantasies, and neurotic symptoms are disguised expressions of repressed, unconscious desires.  They are the unknown unknowns about ourselves.

These unconscious desires may become the source of the dissonance within individuals who continue to revisit their false memories.  Something about these memories is unknown to the person, like a ‘blind spot’.

“My mind doesn't work, my memories don't work like a computer file where I can just retrieve them and, boy, there it is. My mind is selective in terms of memories. When I try to think back to college or high school, there are gaps. I try to fill them in. But I can't tell you it's always the truth.” – John Kennedy

Gaps in Knowledge

We know that the brain has a tendency to fill in gaps in knowledge.  What we think we know can be enhanced through our expectations and beliefs of what is true.  But this construct may be totally inaccurate.  False memories are part of this gap in knowledge. 

Through confabulation, repeating something we believe is true over and over, we create a false memory.  The false memory acts as a repository for our gaps in knowledge.  Our inner being is searching for something to fill the gap because deep down we know that something is missing.

“Self-observation brings man to the realization of the necessity of self-change. And in observing himself a man notices that self-observation itself brings about certain changes in his inner processes. He begins to understand that self-observation is an instrument of self-change, a means of awakening.”
George Gurdjieff

Self-Observations

When we experience false memories what can we learn about ourselves?  Putting ourselves under a microscope will not be necessarily helpful.  Maybe trying to understand what the payoff for the false memory might be would be useful. 

Is my false memory a coverup for something I would rather not remember?  Is there a painful time in my life that I am trying to avoid?  Is my false memory a ‘blind spot’?  Do I prefer to stay blind?

On the other end of the continuum, could I be looking to embellish something that I view as less than it could be?  Are there self-worth issues that need some kind of a boost?  Would discovery of what this need is help me?

Maybe finding the answer to these questions is not the most salient issue.  We know that questions are more important than answers.  Answers tend to change all the time with new information.  However, questions will always be around to challenge us. 

The mere fact that we are seeking to know ourselves better is the real payoff for self-observation.  We will have blind spots in our journey through life but the real tragedy would be not to look for them.